I
have thought about it, I really have.
Especially
since it dawned on me that I spend hours with earphones on my head to enable me
concentrate. The thoughts in my head can only be stilled by something louder.
I
am not in love, I am obsessed. I am addicted to the feeling of wanting, of
needing him.
How
do I stop me from falling deeper and deeper. I am in deep trouble and I don’t see
the end in sight.
How
do I stop the thoughts in my head, the need for that one more moment. The headaches,
heartaches and aches that won’t go away. How do I deal when it is me who is the
addict.
I
am not in love. It is far worse, I am addicted.
Now
I need that space, that time you say it is for calming down. I need space, to
remember to stop. I need that space when not having will be alright.
I
need that space, to realize I am sober. To stop my insanity.
